


Candy Cane Grams

by thegreatwhizzermoroni



Category: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
Genre: Gen, but hey kevins being nice, but like with 10 other people getting candy canes, hes passing out the candy cane grams, ho ho HO, im so sorry, its never too early for christmas, kind of, think of the glen coco scene from mean girls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-23 16:31:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16162661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreatwhizzermoroni/pseuds/thegreatwhizzermoroni
Summary: It’s October 1st, and that means it’s the Christmas season in the eyes of Kevin Price.I’m so sorry.





	Candy Cane Grams

“Ho ho ho, CANDY CANE GRAMS!” Kevin bust through the front door with a large brown sack filled with candy canes. He had somehow managed to find a santa hat and a santa beard... somewhere.

“Kevin.... It’s October....” Connor said, confused as all hell. “It’s never too early for the Christmas season! Now lets see here...” Kevin dug into the bag of candy canes and began to call out names. “Connor McKinley, two for you,” he threw two candy cane grams at connor. “Don’t throw them!”

“Uhhhh Oliver Davis, one for you,” Kevin chucked one at Davis, scaring the poor boy who had to catch it. “Chris Thoma— how did you.. get... that...” Kevin was caught off guard as he saw Poptarts sucking on a candy cane. “You took too long so I found mine.”

Kevins eyes darted from the bag in his hand to Poptarts. That was spooky. Very spooky. He cleared his throat. “Well anyway... One for Michael Michaels!” He forcefully threw Michaels’s candy cane at his face, causing Michaels to flail his arms trying to stop it from hitting him. Instead, it hit Zelder. War will ensue later between them.

Kevin gasped. “Kevin Price?!” He ripped off his santa beard excitedly and yelled “FOUR FOR YOU, KEVIN PRICE, YOU GO, KEVIN PRICE!” Kevin dumped the candy canes out of the bag and onto himself as he emptied out the bag he was holding. Connor facepalmed and Michaels snorted. “Ok uh... who’s next? Oh wow.”

“What?” Davis questioned. “Three for Arnold Cunningham. That’s great,” Kevin deadpanned. Arnold, however, was not here to claim his candy cane grams. He was out with Nabulungi. Kevin hid all three.

Arnold will never know he had three.

“Ok uhh one for Noah Neeley!” Kevin picked up Neeleys and threw the candy cane at Neeley and Davis’s room. The candy cane snapped in half. “Oops.”

Neeley opened the door after hearing the loud bang and stared at his broken candy cane. “What’s this?”

“Candy cane grams!” Poptarts excitedly replied. Everyone else was strangely quiet. Maybe it was because it’s literally the beginning of October and Kevin’s celebrating Christmas. Who knows.

“Ok and one for Zach Zelder!” Kevin threw Zelders candy cane at him. With one swift motion, Zelder smacked the candy cane away from himself and instead it hit Michaels. Michaels hissed. “What was that for?!”

“Hitting me with your candy cane gram.”

“It was on accident!”

“Sure it was.”

“I’m telling the truth!!”

“Excuse me, but why does mine address me as ‘Kevins bitch?’” Connor asked, his eyebrows raising. His question sounded more like a statement. Kevin turned his head to look at Connor and did finger guns at him. “Cause you’re my bitch,” Kevin winked. Connor was scandalized. “I am not your bitch!”

Kevin cleared his throat, now ignoring Connors rant about Kevins ‘tasteful’ choice in nicknames. He looked down at the one remaining candy cane that wasn’t his and opened the tiny card attached to the ribbon. “Jamie Church? Do we have a Jamie Church here?” he asked, confusion laced in his voice. “O-Oh it’s actually J-James,” Church stuttered nervously. His face was red, although he didn’t know if it was from his awkwardness or the fact he too received a candy cane. “Oh, James, here you go,” Kevin lightly tossed Church’s candy cane, but Church failed to catch it anyway. His hands were really shaky, he couldn’t help it.

“Oh, ok, so you’re fine pelting everyone else with candy canes, but when it comes to human anxiety, you can’t.” Michaels crossed his arms, still very bitter about being hit with a candy cane. “Don’t be mean, he’s really shy.” Poptarts glared at Michaels. “My eye almost got poked out! By a candy cane, no less! I have a right to be mad!”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Schrader finally piped up. “You forgot m-“

Kevin grabbed his candy canes hastily and said “And none for Eric Schrader, bye.” He ran to his room with his candy canes. Schrader groaned. “It’s ok, Eric, you can have one of mine,” Connor offered, holding out one of his candy canes. Schrader politely declined. “So, when are we going to put up the halloween decorations?” Neeley asked the whole group. “Now would be a good time,” Davis shrugged.

“Yeah, maybe it’ll take Kevins mind off of Christmas,” Michaels muttered. He was still upset about the candy cane.

“Nothing will take Kevins mind off of Christmas,” Connor pinched the bridge of his nose, thinking of his moron of a boyfriend. “Alright, let’s go get the halloween decorations.”

**Author's Note:**

> Ok but I made a comic literally before writing this and it’s on my instagram so if any of yall are interested in that I’ll send you my @  
> But yeah it’s Christmas time lmao I’m so excited  
> But there’s no snow in Florida and its been a year I’m still mad i live here  
> Tmi I’m sorry I’ll shut up now


End file.
